Raising a Black Family in Mérida, Mexico: Our Experience After Moving Abroad

When my wife and I decided to move to Mexico, we weren't making the decision only for ourselves. We had already raised three children in the United States. But when we started planning this next chapter of our lives, we had a young daughter who would be making the move with us. That changed the equation. We weren't simply asking whether my wife and I could enjoy living in Mérida. We had to ask whether we could build a life here that worked for our daughter too. School. Language. Friends. Culture. Family. Community. Those weren't details we could figure out after the move. They were part of deciding whether the move made sense in the first place. We've now had years to watch that decision play out. And if you're a Black family considering moving to Mérida, I think our experience can give you a much better idea of the questions you should be asking.

We Planned Our Move Around Our Daughter Too

Our daughter was a toddler when we moved to Mérida in 2019. From the beginning, we knew her experience couldn't simply be an extension of ours. Adults can tolerate a lot during an international move because we understand why we're doing it. Children didn't make the decision. They're coming along for the ride. So we thought about schooling, socialization, language and culture before we arrived. One of the smartest things my wife did was begin exposing our daughter to Spanish early. The videos she watched were in Spanish. By the time she arrived in Mexico, some of the characters and sounds she encountered were already familiar to her. That didn't make moving to another country effortless. But it gave her a foundation.

Our Original School Plan Changed

One of the things I've learned about moving abroad is that your plan needs to be strong enough to guide you but flexible enough to change. Our original thought was that we might homeschool our daughter and eventually put her into a local public school. That's not what happened. After arriving in Mérida, we enrolled her in a Spanish-speaking maternal, essentially daycare for younger children. There were adjustments. I remember early communication problems because her teacher didn't speak English and didn't understand some of the English phrases our daughter used. But something else was happening at the same time. She was interacting with children her own age. She was making friends. She was being immersed in Spanish. She was beginning to build a life here that existed independently of Mom and Dad. That mattered.

Choosing a School in Mérida Was More Complicated Than We Expected

When she reached the end of maternal, we started looking at private schools. The process was more involved than I initially expected. We visited schools and went through interviews. Our daughter was evaluated, and the process included information from her previous school. We eventually chose a Montessori school. Then the pandemic happened. Like families all over the world, we suddenly found ourselves dealing with online education for a very young child. My wife put an enormous amount of work into making sure our daughter continued learning during that period. When in-person school returned, however, we began realizing that the Montessori environment wasn't the right fit for her. She wasn't being challenged enough. There were also grade-placement issues that concerned us. Eventually we moved her to a traditional private school that was able to place her at the academic level we believed was appropriate. That experience taught me something important about moving abroad with children: Finding a school isn't the same as finding the right school for your child. A school can have a good reputation and still not be the right environment for your kid. That's true in the United States. It's true in Mexico too.

Watching Our Daughter Become Bilingual

One of the most interesting things about raising our daughter in Mexico has been watching how naturally she moves between English and Spanish. At her school, part of the day is in Spanish and part is in English. When I interviewed her for a video about growing up in Mérida, I asked what happened in her head when someone spoke Spanish to her. Did she hear Spanish, translate it into English, think about the answer and then translate back into Spanish? No. She basically told me she just hears it and responds. To her, switching between the languages had become normal. Meanwhile, she had some advice for me about improving my Spanish. Speak more Spanish. Fair enough. There is a larger lesson there. Children and adults can experience immigration very differently. While I was consciously trying to improve my Spanish, she was growing up inside both languages.

Making Friends Was One of Our Biggest Concerns

School wasn't only about academics. We wanted our daughter to have friends. We wanted her to have the stability of growing up with other children rather than constantly feeling like the American kid passing through Mexico. When I asked whether she had trouble making friends at her new school, her answer was basically no. She already knew some children from her previous school and made more friends after arriving. Her advice to another child moving here was wonderfully simple: Introduce yourself. Say hello. Ask someone if they want to be your friend. If they don't, ask somebody else. Don't be shy. Be brave. As adults, we can turn moving abroad into this enormous complicated thing. Sometimes a child reduces it to exactly what it is.

What Does Home Mean to a Child Growing Up Abroad?

There was another answer during that conversation that stayed with me. Our daughter had spent a significant portion of her childhood in Mexico. But she still had family and memories in Georgia. I asked what she missed most about living there. Her brothers and sisters. Then I asked whether she thought of Mexico as home or Georgia as home. Her answer was: Both. I think that's important for parents considering an international move. Moving abroad doesn't necessarily require your children to erase one home and replace it with another. Our daughter's experience isn't simply American or Mexican. She's growing up with connections to both. As her father, I've had to understand that her experience of this move is going to be different from mine. And that's okay.

The Black Family Community in Mérida Changed Too

When we first arrived in Mérida, there were other Black Americans here. But over the years, I started noticing something changing. More Black families were arriving. That mattered to us because community looks different when you're raising a child. You're not only looking for people you enjoy spending time with. You're looking for other families. Other children. Birthday parties. School friendships. Family activities. People your children can grow up around. By 2023, I was documenting a Black expat community in Mérida that looked considerably different from what I had encountered when we arrived. There were more families and more community events. My wife helped organize a Halloween event with Club Wandergarten that brought together more than 100 kids from different families. I saw Black families participating in events around the city and developing friendships with one another. That doesn't mean every Black family who moves to Mérida automatically finds their community. And it doesn't mean you should move here simply because other Black families are here. But compared with our early years, I've watched the opportunities for connection expand.

Being a Black Family in Mérida Isn't the Only Question

When Black parents research Mexico, it's understandable to ask: What will it be like for my Black child there? I think that's an important question. But after raising our daughter here, I don't think it's the only question. You also have to ask: Will the schools work for your child? How will they handle another language? Will they be able to make friends? What activities are available? What happens if the first school isn't the right fit? How will they maintain relationships with family back home? What does healthcare look like? What kind of neighborhood fits your family's everyday life? How will your income support the life you're trying to create? Those questions may ultimately affect your child's experience just as much as the question that brought you to this article.

Don't Assume Our Experience Will Be Your Experience

Our daughter has done well in Mérida. I'm proud of the life she's building here. But I wouldn't tell another Black family to move to Mérida simply because our family has been happy here. Your child isn't my child. Your finances aren't our finances. Your priorities may be completely different. And a city that works well for one family can be completely wrong for another. That's why I think family relocation decisions require more than watching videos of families who already made the move. Use our experience as information. Then investigate the life your own family would actually have. Visit schools. Explore neighborhoods. Pay attention to the language environment. Talk to other parents. Let your children experience the city. And don't evaluate the move only through the eyes of the adults.

We Didn't Just Move Our Daughter to Mexico

Looking back, I think this is the distinction that matters most. We didn't simply move our daughter to Mexico. We had to build a version of life in Mexico that worked for our daughter. Some of our original plans worked. Others changed. We changed schools. She learned languages. She made friends. Our community grew. And somewhere along the way, Mexico became home to her without Georgia having to stop being home. That's something I couldn't have fully understood when we were planning the move. I had to watch it happen.

Watch Our Daughter Tell Her Own Story

One of my favorite videos I've made is This Is Why Our Daughter Loves Living in Merida Mexico. Instead of only hearing my perspective as her father, you can hear directly from her about school, Spanish, friendships and what she thinks about growing up in Mérida. And if the Black community itself is an important part of your decision, read my guide to Black Expats in Mérida, Mexico, where I go deeper into how that community has changed since my family arrived in 2019.

Before Moving Your Family to Mexico

Moving abroad with children creates a different planning problem from moving by yourself. You're not building one relocation plan. You're trying to make one plan work for several people whose needs may be completely different. That's one of the reasons I created Roadmap to Expat. The purpose isn't to tell your family to move to Mexico. It's to help you look across the different parts of your relocation plan, identify the gaps and determine what needs more attention before you make a decision that affects everyone in your household. Our family's experience shows that raising a child in Mérida can work. Your job is to determine whether the life you're planning can work for yours.